Tuesday, 5 April 2016


My mother hated to quarrel or better, never engaged in exchange of words with anyone all through the time she was alive. She told us that anyone who wanted to quarrel should be ready to hear the most unpleasant things about themselves; most of it would be lies.

I understood and the import hit me when in school, two girls quarreled.

One of them said to the other, ‘shameless girl that is how you go about sleeping with your father.’

‘What?’ Everyone around shouted.

Now to the one that they told this to, she began to cry and plead her innocence. Of course that was the end of the quarrel.

That was the day I appreciated the advice from my mother.

Now let us look at the trending case of Linda Ikeji and Wizkid.

I am 100% sure that Linda from antecedents knew that there was no way Wizkid was going to keep quiet. This was a 25 years old boy, rich, who had sowed his wild oats here and there. In addition, they had quarreled in the past.

She knew and because she already was rich, he was going to use anything and everything to even up. He therefore decided to say she slept with his manager. He knew that this was going to cause some disquiet for Linda. He also knew that it was something that would actually affect her.

How do you know when someone is affected by what you said to them?

If they do a rejoinder then you know you just got them there.

From my own summation, it is always good to just ignore the person so that they know it did not bother you.

Failure to ignore them will make them say that same thing or similar thing another time.

So if you are a young girl and your mother calls you and reels off all the people that have got married and you were at home still eating her eba and soup and you cry.

You have spoilt your case. She will smile and say to herself I now know what will make her unhappy.

Imagine that your mother said that to you and you laughed and hit her playfully and smile and popped a champagne. Do everything outwardly to show you are not affected when you are dying inside.

I tell you, she will never bring up the topic again or she would say something like; the worst is this my daughter is not even ashamed of herself. Other girls would have been crying but see her, she is not even perturbed.’

On the issue of marriage, I am sure Linda was not bothered with that. The truth is that rich people like Linda have a lot of people who would not mind marrying her. The unfortunate thing for her now is finding the person who loves her for herself and not one who is coming close to her because of her money.

For Linda and any other woman, marrying a man with an agenda to ‘scrape’ you of your money is a very unfortunate thing that can happen to you. It is therefore important that she must remove from herself, the anxiety to marry (if there is any in her), so she does not marry the wrong man, the kind that is a described as a wolf in sheep clothing.

Next he claimed she was holed up behind her computer.

The question is why is Linda holed up behind her computer? It is because she is working. It is because she is industrious and it is because she wants to continue to entertain her fans and maintain her lead.

Her work tool is computer. 

A lot of people are failures today because they are lazy and not ready to work hard.

Linda is a very hardworking person. I started blogging long time ago, I abandoned it because I couldn’t cope with the demand of my bank job.

I began blogging again in March 2016 with a determination to be serious with it. It is serious work because there is no holiday for you. If you are absent for extended length of time, your readers will always grumble and if you persist, they leave you.

I googled something once and I saw a post Linda had many years ago, it was just a few comments; fast track to today her fan base has grown.

How many Nigerians are very diligent in what they do? I mean a lot of people who jump from one business to another. When you ask them, they will say to you, ‘o boy that business was just not working so I left.’

 People want the quickest way to make money. If that money does not come within the first few weeks they started that business, they usually give up. They rather even be idle or start tinkering with another line of business.

The world would have had more writers, more fine artists, more scientists who would have written better books, produced finer artworks or made better discoveries respectively, if those people were ‘holed’ behind their work tools.

Next is consistency after success. One of the things we complain about the Super Eagles is that as soon as they score first goal, they relax and think it is all over. However, let us consider this young lady Linda. Despite the lead she has in the blogging business, she has refused to slow down her pace. She is bent on remaining the lead person without diffusing her brand. How many people can?

How many companies have folded simply because the owners treated every money that came as income and spent it all and stopped giving attention to the business?

How many businesses have failed just because the owners after they made money handed it over to their servants to run and even relinquished in principle their supervisory positions?

Linda is worthy of emulation. Her industry is remarkable and indeed she has let all of us know that whoever does work hard and remains consistent will make it. But the question is, how many people are ready to remain consistent?

What is this issue of Linda getting married all about. The fact is a lot of young girls of marriageable ages are yet to marry. Some are without jobs; some are leaving-off men and some homeless and have no idea of what to do with themselves.

But Linda is single but comfortable. She is a blessing to her immediate family and her extended family. She has contributed through her hard work to making life more comfortable to her parents; built a house for them in the village and bought a house here for herself. (There was a picture of her brother in her swimming pool. Pray,  which swimming pool do they want him to use?)

Somebody asked a question once; is it good to cry in a mansion or to cry in a hut? Truly, I am sure a lot of people will not mind that kind of singlehood. LOL


Udo UdoChukwu said...

One common thing with the ordinary African man is jealousy and readiness to condemn instead of commend. Lynda is successful so it should be clear to her that many people would rather envy her. But for me, she has my thumbs up. Haters can go on while she continues to flourish.

Anonymous said...

Men indulging in verbal insults just portrays them as childish and foolish!