Tuesday, 8 March 2016

LETTER TO MAUREEN, MY 25 YEAR OLD FRIEND WHO SOUGHT FOR MY ADVICE – PART ONE



Dear Maureen,

O what an honour it is for you to ask me to advise you as a 25years old woman. In your own words, what advice would I have given my 25years old self? Honestly I wish this advice I had given them to myself but then again how possible was that? Most times however, people learn from experience. But I can see what you are doing which is smart of you; you want to tap from experience of those who have been through it.


You see Mau Mau, when people respond to the questions any regret with no regret. I think to myself what a liar. Regrets are in varying degrees. At best the answer would have been yes naturally I have my regrets but I have moved on.

Do you know Maureen that some things you did when you were as young as 25 years can come to haunt you for life?

Can you imagine leaving university with a third class or a pass not on the account that you were not bright but because you did not take your studies serious? How on earth would that not come to forever haunt you?

Can you imagine being told by a doctor, I am sorry young lady, with what has happened, you will never conceive all your life because during the last abortion, your womb was affected, do you think that will not haunt you for life?

Can you imagine if your mother says to you, my doctors say my heart is failing and I know why? How can I watch my child have HIV and I am happy. No the day I heard you had HIV was the day I began to die a little? How will you feel knowing your wayward life led to this?

So my first wisdom tip for you Mau Mau, is not to do anything or things that will come to haunt you later in life.

Before taking action, ask yourself;  of what benefit is this thing I want to do? How will it make me a better person and how will it enhance my profile positively?

Therefore what are things I should do?

Well at 25, I assume you would have had your first degree not because I had my first degree at 21 but so you can at least be off school and plan for your life. In the event you have not, I want to advise that you pass through the university and seriously allow the university to pass through you but not in those silly ways people think about.

When people are talking about university passing through them; they are thinking in terms of the prodigal son who led a riotous life.

No. that is university passing through you in the wrong way. Do you know of campus fellowships? Do you know you can do sports? My daughter as  a first year medical student is the vice-president of her volley ball team. She has friends in and out of court. Not only is the sports disciplining her, she is also interacting socially as best as she can. Do you know throughout her stay she will be going round to universities to represent her school during the Nigerian Universities Games? Will anyone say university is not passing through her because she was not drinking, smoking and engaging in pre-marital sex?

Do you know there are creative clubs in school? Do you know there are debating clubs? Do you know that you can start a group for the passion you like that is not found in school? There are decent clubs in school that promote humanity. Do you know you can start a singing group assuming you were talented in that area?

I don’t know about you but don’t let the things you did in school come to rub off on you in the worst way. Pass through the university in the most decent manner you can.

Maureen, I am so sorry, I have to run off to do school run. I will continue this letter another time.

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