Saturday, 27 February 2016

MOTHER’S LOVE





When I became pregnant for my first daughter, I was excited. I had just married this wonderful man of my dreams and I was carrying his child. However, it was such an eerie feeling that a full blooded human being was growing inside of me.

However I was later to discover that becoming pregnant was the easiest part of it after all the child was conceived in pleasure but carrying the baby full term was another thing altogether.


From the first few months, I could not recognize this body that has been mine for over many years.

Sometimes I don’t want to spit but the body says, ‘you must’ and even when I said enough was enough, my body would refuse and spit even more until I was reduced to carrying a container that contained sand or sometimes was filled with tissue paper. O how sometimes I threw up just by perceiving my own spit. I am a sophisticated woman, a lawyer no reach that side.

Each time the body would decide in the morning that it felt like throwing up. For what now? I would wonder. There is nothing in my stomach I would moan and my body would laugh and say to me, ‘that is your business. I feel like throwing up.’ And after my body believes it was enough, it will pop out this vile purple bitter thing which tastes worse than Nivaquine. Satisfied, my body would decide I needed rest.

O how I hated the fact that brushing my teeth was an ordeal because with it comes this violent throwing up exercise from the body I no longer recognized.

O those periods of internal heat that makes you think that something had gone very wrong with your air conditioner when truly there was nothing wrong with it.


You watch yourself detest your favourite soap, deodorant and perfume and you have an immediate dislike for anyone who used any of them because your body did not like them and did not want them anywhere you.


You watched your weight balloon only smiling when you are reminded that the weight was because you are bringing your own to the world. Your body does not make it any easier, demanding to eat everything in sight even some unwholesome food.


O the swollen legs that made your feet so ugly.


The tiredness that sometimes overwhelmed you, despite recognizing you had to work both at home and in the office.


The pills from hospital that make you feel sick each time you belch.


Then the shapelessness of all your clothes and your body’s demands that you discard old clothes for new ones whether you had money to do that or not.



The days and nights drag. You design a calendar and begin to cross out the days to the Expected Date of Delivery(EDD). It still does not speed up the process.


Your body would suddenly decide on different emotions; it can suddenly start crying at something not so serious or laugh at nothing. Your body decides you must be on a short fuse even if prior to that, you were the sweetest person on earth.


Each time, you try to make sense out of what is happening to you but without success.


The nurses in the ante natal classes talk about these changes.


You hear terms like hormonal changes and you begin to see the changes physically.


Your nose begins ‘to big’ and your mouth ‘begins to long’. You listen as some kind people say ‘pregnancy suits you.’ of course you come to understand that a new life is growing inside of you.


As the days roll by and you begin to feel the movements of the baby in your womb, you grow very excited and look forward to this new baby that will make you a complete woman and a mother!

Did you experience this? Maybe you can share with us your peculiar experiences.

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